Suppose God simply removed all our difficulties and temptations in one go. It would solve the problem. It would be like being back in the garden of Eden. Yet actually there were challenges to face in that garden: a world to subdue and a serpent to resist. People don’t grow to maturity by sitting on the beach at Malibu. I know; I do it. We grow through facing things, wrestling with things.
–John Goldingay. (2010). Numbers and Deuteronomy for Everyone. Society for Promoting Christian Knowledge; Westminster John Knox Press. (p. 126).
When I was just fourteen years old, I was called to be a minister. It wasn’t something that was revealed all at once or knocked me for a loop. What happened was that my church camp counselor from Ohio Christian University simply said he was youth ministry major and God placed on my heart that it was what I was going to do. Fourteen year old Cody probably would’ve assumed it was a pretty straightforward path from there. The true path was much wilder.
Who led you through the great and terrible wilderness, an arid wasteland with poisonous snakes and scorpions. He made water flow for you from flint rock. He fed you in the wilderness with manna that your ancestors did not know, to humble you and to test you and in the end to do you good.
–Deuteronomy 8:15–16 (NRSVue)
Luckily, I have been able to avoid poisonous snakes and scorpions. There have been some terrible and “arid” parts of this journey so far. That is how it is for many Christians and it is only through reliance in God that we can move forward, otherwise we end up like Moses and the Israelites wandering around and not even having the pillar of cloud by day and pillar of fire by night. We need to ask God to help us before trials, praise him in the middle of the storm, and give thanks on the other side. Without God we are nothing. Literally down to the essence of who we are—Imago Dei. Being made in the image of God is what makes us who we are. God supplies our existence and any attempt to face hardships without him will be futile.
The hardest thing I am currently facing is trying to find a ministry job where I can vocationally serve the Lord. I have obtained a Bachelor of Arts in Christian Ministry and a Masters of Ministry in Practical Theology—neither of which were easy or conventional. I had hope that going through that would be my key to finding my fit where I can fruitfully serve the Lord for an extended period of time. The long awaited payoff for that work…
I have this earnest desire to serve God using the ministerial gifts he has given me—most notably, teaching. Additionally, I have the desire to pursue the passions that he has sewn into my being. I love theology and discipleship and fully believe that many youth group students could go deeper in their faith if we focus on spiritual depth more and pizza and games less. Unfortunately, finding this fit has been much harder than expected. The process of constantly looking for jobs and analyzing my potential match with listings has proven exhausting. I began looking for full-time ministry jobs in 2020. These nearly five years have left me feeling an awful lot like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole. My only step forward remains trusting in God.
Often when times are hard and we have to depend on God for our daily needs, we remember Him and obey Him. But when ‘things are going well’ and we have more than we need, we become self-sufficient and forget God.
Warren W. Wiersbe. (1993). Wiersbe’s Expository Outlines on the Old Testament. Victor Books. (p. 197).
How often do you rely on God? When you examine your life does it reveal that you trust God more than your money, the government, or even your family? I find great comfort in recitation of the Lord’s Prayer on an individual level because it provides the idea that we should trust God for our daily needs, forgiveness, and to avoid temptation. Praying this regularly, on the good and bad days (though probably a few extra on the bad), helps me to always focus on how much I need God.
It’s easy to trust God with the big things, the long-term goals, or the pipe dreams. Is this not like attempting to travel to Japan from America with just a globe? You would either be completely lost and accept it or be stubborn enough to think you can figure out the rest without street maps or airport layouts. That isn’t how our faith should be. We should be so faithful that we trust God to build us an itinerary where every step is mapped out from when we wake up to the day we return home on that trip. Sure, God works like a tour guide who doesn’t let us see the full itinerary but that is why we must trust Him.
Life is hard. Adam and Eve left the Garden of Eden and that hasn’t changed since. I really don’t need to tell you how my life is hard because you probably have your own reasons. Furthermore, the Bible is filled with people who trusted God while living hard lives. I decided to give a snapshot of some of my difficulties anyway. Not to seek praise but to transparently wrestle with that difficulty in writing. Maybe it will encourage some readers, maybe it won’t. Regardless of what you think of my journey, I want to leave you with this. No matter what tomorrow brings—ask God to bring you your daily bread.
Moments with Emmanuel 